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My career, my ethics informing my intimate relationships

I like the way you mapped that out in detail Tina Gabriel’s.

During my career, I had to always fight to get important detail, while maintaining our plain language dictum which was central to our disadvantaged client understanding rights drawn from interlocking Federald & State laws.

I worked for 33 years as a human rights lawyer & social justice policy analyst.

That was across the community and public sectors.

We produced a lot of publications for our clients older residents of nursing homes & retirement Village. Plus social housing tenants.

As a lawyer, I worked on the successful Arrernte peoples Indigenous Land and Water claim over their traditional land & waters in Centrsl Australian arid red soil county in and around Alice Springs.

As a Principal Policy Officer in the State Housing agency, the largest globally, I developed a drew the complex Aboriginal & other social entitlements for Odle to build an easy to use calculator to identify the social housing rent this Aboriginal families had to pay taking into account their Federal entitlements.

Amongst numerous other responsibilities, I managed a state wide system in co-ordination

with the Sex Crimes Unit of NSW (my state)

Police & NSW Prisons.

The aim was to keep convicted sex offenders (pedofiles) houses away from young people under 16.

I took 9 weeks leave from this position on August to travel East Asia. I did Tokyo for 13 weeks  flying to Istanbul.

The late winter snows found me in Helsinki Finland. It was there in February 2016 I resigned my position by email and continued my second global trip that took me from Europe to the Caribbean, yes the Dominican Republic  where else for this second Saint Dominic.

I had to go to Comminist Cuba and danced with Cuban women to the music of the last surviving member of the world famous Buena Vista Social Club.

Via two other nations in that region  I found my way to Brazil, where at the end of my Brazilian sojourn I was introduced to Andressa Patricia Conçeption, who pursued me online. She terminated our 2 year online connection about 10 days ago. Initially, I was very angry at how she ambushed me around 4am my time to cut me loose.

It didn’t take me long to feel liberated and ley go, at least for now, ideas of getting even.

You’ll read a lot about Ms Conception in this series  Intimacy Ebbs and Flows!

Thanks for asking

A LinkedIn colleague just asked how I was.

I gave her my short answer, “I feel fine”.

I then gave her my long answer as follows.

Wonderful I finally got my apartment  ship shape tonight after living five months here at the Quarterdeck Wentworth Point.

Having sailed on the Bunjalung (Clarence) River as a teenager I have appointed myself the Quartermaster of this good ship, the QuarterDeck.

I certainly wasn’t the


Quartermaster of Andressa Patricua Conçeption, I met for a mere 2 to 3 hours in Roo 2 years ago.

Andressa followed me up determinly online and won my  interest. It became an intense emotionally passionate romance for me and an increasingly controlling one on her part.

I would protest at her failure to respond to my heartfelt messages. And she would generally ignore me. I should have walked  but I had allowed her to hook me.

Trusting Dominic who tends to see the good rather than the bad, indeed sometimes evil, finally saw what Andressa had done to win my heart then treat be badly. Sadistic pleasure in her part and she admitted she “hates white people”.

I can understand that, but was unprepared for how that could play out in rampantly sexual, and sex denied as part of a racially based payback to white male travellers such as myself.

I tokd her about 2 months ago that she would have to end our ‘non relationship”. She declined telling me I “was to juicy”. More fool me.
A few weeks later she said it was over. I probably continued to complain on WhatsApp, our communication platform as we didn’t have a common language. She ignored me.

Then a week ago, out of the blue, she contacted me with a number of spurious and allegations about my behaviour and state of mind. I think that was her rather childish payback for the many criticisms I made of her.

For a few days I was going to have another crack at her in an attempt to get her to realise the harm she is doing.

I thought Andressa doesn’t care what I say about her. I thought she needed to be shamed in front of her community. But I doubt there would be much shame, I sense her behaviour is common in that community.

Anyway U’ve finally let her know. I reread one of my last messages to her , it was frank and hard hitting. What you write when you see no future in a relationship.

All she replied was that “I am crazy”. Easily said Andressa, but what about the substance of my critique of your attempted, emotional domintrix  behaviour towards me.

She knows what I think, she’s in denial which is strange fir a dominating human, they normally  celebrate and talk up their power.

I had to free myself from her web and I believe I did that when re-read my powerful condemnation of her and felt I could leave it behind.

So that gets me back to my shirt answer to you  I feel good.

Thanks for asking!

The social media ‘look at me’s just don’t get it!

A few days on Instagram I was asked this question by a young woman whose profile page is adorned with photos of herself.

True to the heart and soul of my site here I responded:

“I’m 66 and I know the complexity of that question and the answer. The answer is simple, in the human coldness, of our modern world, where marriages in Australia last under 8 years, where de facto couples would not be doing much better, maybe worse, where gender relations are in deep trouble.

Yes men assault women in terrible ways.

And women, particularly attractive, well dressed, well paid younger women look at you with ‘eyes colder than your icy beer’

After the 2015, Sydney Marfi Gra night I was harassed by young men all the way from Oxford St to Glebe cos I was dressed & made up too femme. For them!

Around 3am on New Years Day 2016, I was violently bashed by a young Georgian thug for looking too femme. Admittedly and stupidly, I taunted him with denunciations of Joseph Stalin who was Georgian( between Russia & Turkey) and became President of the USSR, which has since collapsed and reduced to Russia.

Stalin led his brave, underequipped armed forces to turn back the superior German forces of Hitler.

I think that was the first turning point if that 2nd War. Dunkirk was the second.

Back to Intimacy.

I’ve lived and breathed it all my adult life.

I don’t believe I have been met anywhere near halfway by the 3 de facto partners I’ve had, totalling over 35 years That’s the main concern.


With casual sex, just this side or a long way, this side of intimacy, it is harder to tell. The connection is too short to get anywhere near each others soul.

At the same time, I would like to do Glory Hole sex, where you don’t even see the other person.

Here’s my wrap on Intimacy, and it’s up to date

https://intimacyebbsflows.wordpress.com/